Used to think that life was sweet.
Used to think we were so complete…
It’s so funny how we don’t talk anymore.
It’s so funny why we don’t talk anymore…
Among others, sung by Cliff Richards
Not all that long ago, I discovered that communication has always been the most powerful tool in human existence.
I will give you a simple concise example of what I am speaking about. In the ancient books of wisdom it tells about a group of people, in Babylon,who set about building a tower destined to reach heaven. Construction was well on its way, when all of a sudden, God, caused every person to start speaking a different language!
According to the ancient manuscript, up to that point, the whole world spoke the same language.
Now, because there was no longer understandable communication between the workers, construction of the tower halted and it was never completed.
This gives new meaning to the expression, ‘A war being won without words’.
The tower construction project failing was one thing, but what about all of us in this day and age? We can’t leave the borders of our own country without struggling to make ourselves understood by people in other countries. If you like me, I don’t have to leave my country’s borders to face this situation: we have eleven official languages in my country and I only speak two of them!
Did you ever consider, we humans have nothing without the ability to communicate with each other?
Where this situation impacts us the most, is in the relationships we have with our fellow humans and those closest to us; our spouses, children, parents and other family members.
Looking at my life over the years and being very objective in my assessment of myself and my behaviour to those with whom I had close ties; I realise that I, even with my upbringing and education and being a ‘naturally good communicator’, have failed to have meaningful communication with my fellow humans and those closest to me.
I need to add another discovery I have made. Communication is not limited to speech alone, but also embraces hearing and more importantly, listening. (To hear is automatic, to listen is a choice).
Do you purposefully speak and consciously listen to those that come into your space and those that are near and dear to you, especially your spouse and children?
When I say ‘speaking’, I mean the type that enquires, encourages and conveys feelings that are in the moment.
Enquiry says, ‘I am interested in what’s on your mind just now, your dreams, hopes and yes, even fears.
Encourage says, ‘you can achieve, because you are able; you are so worth success; as you dream and hope, you attract all these wonderful things to yourself’.
Feelings in the moment says, ‘You are very special to me, you are a gift to my life and you make me feel complete.’
Never forget, fear is only a viewing of what you think you see and fear always fades in the light.
Lastly, I absolutely NEVER give advice, even when its asked for, …..I rather ask questions listen, hug and where possible, pray for the one seeking advice. These actions, I have found, bring far greater results than any amount of advice I can offer. I believe wholeheartedly that this is the most effective communication I can give to those that enter my space.